Life Changes

My last posts have been about my life and what I have been up to. This post will be a little bit different. It still pertains to my life but in a different way than just events.  I will have some events but mostly some feelings that I have had just recently.

Yesterday was my last day of school for the year and I am on summer break and waiting for news of where I will interview. I hope to know as soon as I can to where I will be teaching next year. Now on to my rant of some things that I have been wondering for the last little bit, that is Singles Wards.

In August I moved down here to Arizona to do some student teaching and to start my career. In that time I made sure to find the singles ward that I lived in and to attend it. Starting in August I went to church every week along with attending all of the activities. Shortly after a month I had failed to make any friends and I felt very unwelcomed in the ward. This continued to get worse as time went on. I received a calling in the ward to head up FHE and to help with setup and planning. I would attend for this reason and this reason only. Now I do not attend FHE since I have joined a soccer league and I do not attend church as often either. I know that this is a surprise to most of my family but I want to tell them that I still believe in the church but I do not believe in the ward that I am in. At this point in time I do not get any calls from members of the ward and when I invite people I get ignored by the people. I heard people commenting on how great the ward is and how welcoming they are but I still feel like a visitor even after being here for almost a year now.  I have made the choice that I no longer want to attend that ward and I will be looking to move when I am financially able to so that I can move to another ward and start attending again.

I have had these feelings for awhile and I have tried to fix it by just going to go but I can only go through so much on my own before I can’t take it anymore.  What makes it worse it that I see other members of the ward being constantly asked how they are doing but fail to make any attempts to others in the ward. I know I am not alone in this but I just wanted to let people know how I feel and where I am at in life.

I am still happy with who I am and how I living my life. I know the church is true but I would like to feel that I am welcome and needed in the ward. I have always felt that and gotten that no matter how many times I have moved.